Saturday, October 3, 2009

I love Saturdays

I had left-over garlic bread sticks and sweet tea for breakfast. Yummy! Took my foster kitty to the vet -- I thought she had a fever and worried about her being dehydrated, but she's fine.

You guys will notice I deleted one of the posts I made up. Your comments were interesting, and you definitely read more into what that lady had to say than I did. My thought process (which, being up late last night, wasn't exactly in the best working order *LOL*) was very simple, and based upon something I read once: that women need to be shown that they're loved in order to feel loved (you know, hubby doing something sweet and thoughtful to show he cares), and men need to feel respected and needed (but not TOO needed, there's a balance, as with everything) to feel loved. Okay, I didn't get that quite as the person wrote it originally, so I'll see if I can find where I read it.

I'm not going to say that I agreed with everything (let's face it, I always have something to say about virtually everything ^_^), but there were some things that I did like. I do agree with you guys that marriage should be an equal partnership -- my mom and stepdad are like that, and they've been happily married for somewhere around 18 years.

My dad's marriages have not been like that, because it is "his way" or else you're wrong -- that includes with me and my brother. That was a huge problem in his marriage with my mom -- he was the man, the boss, the head of the household, he was controlling (which I now see), and he didn't like the way the Episcopal church did things; he thinks only the Pentecostals are right. His family is fairly fundamental -- being mostly men, they all go for "the man is the boss" stance. Since two of my aunts (by marriage) believe much the same, those marriages have worked (did work -- one uncle passed away at 44 from liver cancer my senior year of high school, but he'd been with my aunt for 30 years -- the only woman he ever dated), and both parties have been happy. My dad's one sister is something of the boss in her marriage, I think, but I've never spent enough time around her to really know for sure. My grandparents were married for around 40 years, until my grandfather passed away when I was 12, and my dad said they loved each other, but they argued all the time.

All in all, my dad's family isn't the best example to follow, so I look at my mom and stepdad, and the wonderful marriage my grandmother and grandfather (mother's parents) had. I've never seen two people love each other as much as my grandparents -- my grandmother loved my Poppy, and he adored her. A few months before she passed away, I asked her if she and Poppy had ever argued -- with my dad's parents being like they were, the fact that I never heard either of my mom's parents raise their voices at each other stood out in stark contrast. She couldn't think of a single time they'd argued, which is extraordinary.

Of course, I don't expect that for myself -- I've seen enough with my dad's many divorces on one hand, and my mother's 18-year marriage on the other. I also know that I can be difficult sometimes, so I'll need a hubby with patience and lots of love for me, even when I'm a brat. ^_^

But God is good and knows me better than I know myself, and he already has picked out the man for me, so I just have to trust Him to point us towards each other when He decides it's time. Of course, I won't be sitting around doing nothing in the meantime. : )

I will say I didn't write down everything that I think on this topic, but I'm too lazy. Lots of typing = aching knuckles.

Anyway, on to more frivolous discussions. : P Are you guys having a good weekend? So far I've slept in and sat in the vet office for 3 hours. ^_^


  1. Oh yes, I've heard that line of thinking too. That women need love, men need respect. Let me tell you something: shortly after I met M, but before I noticed he was more than just a musician, I was in a situation where I needed to write down my expectations from a relationship with a man. Looking at that list later, I was struck by the fact that every one of the 20 or so points on the list had something to do with respect. There was *not one word* about love. *Not one word* about passion. *Not one word* even about affection. And let's just say that last time I tried to pee standing up - which was a LONG time ago - the result was disastrous... LOL

    I have spent my weekend in the company of my cats, but not in the doctor's office. Besides that, I was supposed to be working but didn't feel up to it, so I went and priced abayas and hijabs online instead.

    Was very annoyed to find that the Desert Sands abaya on is out of stock in my size. But they have beautiful and quite reasonably priced stuff - you should take a look if you haven't already.

    Other than that, I took a look at Gorgeous items. A bit more expensive than SunnahStyle, so I'll need to do a bit of financial planning to manage it.

    And then I confess to doing a bit of window shopping at I've had my eye on their Black Locust for quite some time. That thing is not a purchase. It's an investment. But I love it anyway - that and the Cat's Whiskers, which is in a class by itself...

    And now I'm contemplating sleep - a necessity if I want to be at church tomorrow. Which is particularly important because the Harvest Festival will be observed, the altar will be decorated with flowers and fruits and veggies, and I have an annual tradition of grabbinga flower and (if possible) a lemon afterward, and taking them up to the choir loft to give to M...

  2. It was nice reading your views of the marriage topic. I read the post the other day, but never commented on it. I can see why you would agree with some of the things presented by that blogger.

    I can be a real brat sometime, but I got a extremely kindhearted husband. God was good to me when He blessed me with someone who loves me even when I am less-than-stellar. :-)

    Garlic bread sticks and tea for breakfast sound like a pretty good way to start the day! Ha, ha!

    Have a good week!

  3. This has nothing to do with this post, but whatever. :)

    You bought a bunch of niqaab from al-mujalbaba, right? (pretty sure that was you). How'd you find the quality? I know you said it wasn't so good on the half-niqaab from hijabgirl.

  4. Yeah, I bought those. The quality is good. They're nice and light and airy. : )

    The quality on the al-Amira hijabs (two piece) that I got from HijabGirl isn't very good. The stitching is already coming apart on the purple one I bought.

  5. Susanne- Forget Wheaties! Garlic parmesan breadsticks and strong sweet tea is the breakfast of champions! ; P